It’s Not Been a Good week

I can feel that depression rolling in.

So I need to stop it in it’s tracks.

The last week has been a grind.

Since Sunday I just haven’t had the energy to do much, it could be my body transitioning to Ketones or it could be that I’ve lost my direction and am kinda in a ‘What Now’ situation. So…

What Now?

My interests have been meandering, my thoughts can’t seem to hold on to anything longer than it takes me to read a book on the subject. The YouTube videos I planned on making each week have already, after three weeks, gotten to a point where I just can’t be bothered… I just make excuses.

My drive to create is gone.

I woke up this morning, an hour later than I’d planned. I haven’t done anything since then. I woke up three hours ago. Now I’m here writing this.

Today is a particularly bad day, yet this happens every week.

My Sundays are usually messed up because I’m so tired after three late shifts at the bar, getting home a 2-2:30 am, Cause and effect?

Is this the reason that my mood changes on Thursdays too?

Is working at the bar the problem?

I don’t want to be there. I quit working bars because I didn’t like it, but right now it’s my only source of income.

For the first time in, gawd knows how long, I’m requesting time off.

Two weeks.

It’s all I can afford right now.

I need time to think, to decide what it is I NEED to do.

I need time to figure out where, and on what, to focus my mind.

Is two weeks enough? (actually, it works out to 18 days).

Is that going to be enough?

I’m a Professional Photographer who dabbles in Writing and Documentary Film Making.

I’ve recently quit my job of three and a half years as a Bartender/Manager. Photography began as a hobby and quickly became a passion.

I’m a Professional Photographer, Filmmaker, Writer/Author and this website is where I’m going to document all of it. The good, the bad and the ugly.

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