The Darkside
Your Shadow Self
Psychiatrist Carl Jung said;
"It is a frightening thought that man also has a shadow side to him, consisting not just of little weaknesses and foibles, but of a positively demonic dynamism."
We've all had those thoughts.
Telling that loudmouth to shut up. Wanting to offer a breath mint to that guy who leans in a little too close when he talks to you. Or burying that annoying POS under your patio because, no body, no murder.
The Shadow, or dark side, of ourselves, is that part of the ego that wants to do the things that might not be socially acceptable. I mean, how often have you thought about killing someone? Be Honest.
The goal here isn't to eliminate the dark side but to accept it for what it is; a part of who you are.
That's not to say you should act on it every time a subversive thought pops into your head. I mean killing a guy because he is chowing loudly isn't the done thing.
But sometimes;
Telling that annoying loudmouth to shut up will save you a lot of brain ache, and maybe save those within ear shoot the same.
Or those kids on the bus playing loud music through a speaker.
That mate who calls out of the blue and wants a 4-hour chat because he has nothing else to do and neither do you apparently.
Or telling that guy who is upset that a small Tesco Express is temporarily closed at 2:30 am to restock shelves. To relax.
That last one actually happened at 2:30 am on Sunday morning. He took photos of the temporary closed sign and the 'Open 24 Hours' sign, and threatened the staff for having the balls to close at 2:30 am in an area of London usually filled with drunk punters. Especially when the shop is next to a bus stop. He told his companion that he was going to send a letter to the Tesco HQ about it.
Yeah, good luck with that mate.
I wanted to turn to him and ask him if his life was fulfilling. If complaining about stupid things, like people wanting to work in peace for 30 minutes, not be bothered by drunk idiots, is really so bad that he feels the need to do the very British thing of writing a letter to Tesco HQ, knowing full well that no one there will care. And would he in fact be using personalised stationery?
I could have said all that but what would it achieve? It's highly unlikely that the guy would just leave it at that. Most likely I would have spent the next few minutes, while waiting for my bus, hearing his backlash, his shadow self. Maybe he would have written me a stern letter of complaint. Who knows.
Understanding when your Shadow is speaking and whether or not speaking what's on your mind will end the problem or exacerbate the situation. Being able to translate your dark thoughts in a way that could end the situation in a positive way is a skill. But we never really know how others, especially those we don't know will react to what you have to say.
Developing this skill will improve your communication skills. Being able to negotiate for your desired outcome is always better than an angry outburst, which rarely ends well. Right or wrong.
Problem - Thought - Negotiation - Solution.
Problem - Loudmouth
Thought - SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Negotiation - 'Shut the fuck up' will just make things worse.
Solution - 'Mate, would you mind keeping it down.'
There are a lot of benefits from acting quickly on a thought, but sometimes you just need to stop and think for a second. And that's all it usually takes, a second to think.
Being able to translate our Shadow will benefit you in the long run. We shouldn't try to repress it, just translate it into something useful. The more you do this, the easier it gets and the more automatic it'll become.
I’m a Professional Photographer who dabbles in Writing and Documentary Film Making.
I’ve recently quit my job of three and a half years as a Bartender/Manager. Photography began as a hobby and quickly became a passion.
I’m a Professional Photographer, Filmmaker, Writer/Author and this website is where I’m going to document all of it. The good, the bad and the ugly.
Event Portfolio
Street Portfolio
Other